Monday, March 14, 2011

Books, Diseases, and Moving Day

This is going to be quite the random post... I want to write something, but so much has happened lately that I'm not going to be able to keep it separated nicely into topics.  So, here we go!  I just finished reading Drums, Girls, & Dangerous Pie, by Jordan Sonnenblick - it's phenomenally written!  It captured me from the get-go, had me turning pages faster than I could read them at times; it pulled at my heart, yet was hilarious throughout, yet also very true to life - I felt very connected to the characters and the themes.  I'm actually glad, though, that I've held off reading it for a while (it's been under my piano bench for a few months, waiting to be picked up).  The main character, Steven, has a vibrant younger brother who contracts leukemia, and has to be taken to the big city weekly for treatments.  And it affects the family's whole life, to how they get along with each other, to each individual's reactions with the everyday.
I can't even imagine what that must be like for that family, yet I'm not very far away from it: my best friend's dad recently was diagnosed with cancer.  He's been one of my heroes for a long time, the main reason being that he was so strong, he was invincible, he could do anything, and he chose to make his and his family's life the best he could make them.  And now every ounce of fight that's left in him is to just keep him living one more day...  I've driven to his house tens of times, gone up to the Cancer Center to see him multiple times, but not once have I been able to face him, to go in through those doors and actually say, "Hi".  It's something that has eluded my struggling courage every time.  Which is strange, because I'm sure that he is stronger now than he ever has been, just not on the outside, which pains me to see.
Maybe it's because when I visit my grandma almost daily in the care center, I get my fill of seeing suffering and pain - my grandma, suffering from memory lapse and loss, and old age, doesn't even know who I am anymore.  One day I'm an old home teacher, the next a neighbor, the next I'm some boy who married her niece... I've stopped signing my name on the books for fear of confusing her even more.  Now I'm not saying that Doug wouldn't remember me, but I see the pain in my grandma's eyes, and maybe that pain is enough to witness for a while.
These past couple weeks I've been preparing to move, okay okay - more like the last day or two, and by Tuesday I'll be in a new place.  Living here the past 20 months has been the longest, by far, that I've lived in one place since I left the nest at 18.  I gotta admit, living by myself was bliss, but I think I grew up a lil too much, so it's gonna be fun having a roommate and digressing back to boys being boys.  I just hope my elbow holds up to all the heavy lifting, but if it doesn't, it's always nice to have a valid excuse for not being out on time, such as, "I just had surgery on my elbow, and I'm having another operation here in a few days, so give me a break, alright?"  I hope it works, cause I'm not super optimistic about having all my stuff out tomorrow.
Anyway, on a brighter note, since this has been dim, I went to a Conference last week, and I'm renewed and re-energized to go into my classroom and change the world!  Teaching, ahh, the only profession whose job is to change the human brain, and therefore the world, every day.  Good thing they pay me well to do it ;)